It would help if you always continued listening when engaged. It would help if you listened with your eyes. Often, a person living with dementia will start to become more withdrawn as the disease progresses. They are less likely to communicate with you. The words seem to lose their importance to the person. The person starts to become more of a physical being. Often, this is when we see the person fidgeting, chewing, and touching all the time.
The sensation feels good to the person. The brain is no longer allowing words to come out in a language that we can understand. During the progression of dementia, words lose their importance to the person. This is primarily held when the brain function turns to dementia. The physical touch seems to take on more meaning. There is more hand-holding. Many love gentle massages. As the progression of dementia, remember to do more listening with your eyes.
When you listen with your eyes, it conveys your thoughts to the person. Your feelings are important, too. This is a way for you to cope in the process. Let the person know how you feel. You love or care for the person, and they need to hear this. This can bring trust between the two of you when engaging. When this is accomplished, you will find even more and better ways to engage.
Be mindful of your identity. In other words, be true to yourself when engaging. The person you encounter can see with their eyes if you are true to yourself. Presenting yourself as happy when unsatisfied is evident to the person watching you. Some say that people with dementia are more likely to understand your real feelings. This is highly likely since they judge you by your appearance versus what they think of you. The thinking process is limited, so they feel more frequently.
Perhaps it is crucial to think about how you make first impressions. This could be a first impression for each interaction. Concentrate on what the eyes are looking at. Are you engaging with the person with frustration? It is then very likely the loved one will become frustrated, too. Are you teary-eyed during the moments together? This reflects how the person with dementia will engage with you.
Turn yourself into a mirror. Think about how you look. Go ahead and look in a mirror before you engage. Think of the mirror as the eyes of the person you are going to visit. Listen with your eyes as to how you look, act, and feel. This can help with how the visit will be either a positive or a negative engaging moment. Take into consideration how you want the moments to be engaging. Think with your eyes before interacting.
It is challenging for caregivers to make progress with engaging and care when the person constantly changes behaviors and moods. Again, listen with your eyes. Look at them and see how they are feeling. Engage in conversation. It can become frustrating and cause stress. It is a time to remember that, more than likely, they are frustrated at you. Here is something to consider. Anosognosia is a condition in which people do not recognize they had a change in medical need. It is widespread in people who have mental illness and also Alzheimer's/dementia.
This is a result of damage to the anatomical and physical changes in the brain. Our right side of the brain detects changes in physical, emotional, and mental health. When damaged, the person has difficulty putting the changes into a sense of reality. Signs to recognize and look for are not taking care of oneself, becoming angry when the topic comes up, and confabulation. Confabulation is making up answers that a person believes are accurate.
How do you approach this challenging issue?
1. Create a caring environment.
2. Be positive and encouraging.
3. Compassion and understanding.
This is very important...listen to what they are saying and don't react immediately. This is a time to provide positive conversations for you and the person. Let the person know that you understand how they feel. This is giving empathy. Sometimes, the person is more likely to listen to what you say after you have provided compassion.
Stay calm. Remember that you will not change their minds or convince this person. It's essential to keep up with the day-to-day activities to ensure the person is safe. This might be a good time to remember that as long it's not harming them, don't worry about it. If you are concerned they can hurt themselves, devise constructive ways to address the issue. Remember that you are not alone, and there are millions of other caregivers going through the same problems. Talk with other caregivers and get support. The most important is to practice patience.
Learn to listen with your eyes and remain patient. You are going to need to stay calm when engaging. Take a moment to address the mood of the person you are engaging with. Perhaps it's time to end the moment of engaging together. Try another tactic. Examine the person's perspective and if you can be involved with the person. It would be best if you listened with your eyes to change the environment or situation. But keep in mind that you are being judged by the person you are engaging with during the transition.
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